Sorry to be late. This is Lorin.
She sleeps peacefully. The cardinals (bird type) are making their daily twilight run at the bird feeder, just feet from her head at the other side of the glass (window) and their insistent cheerful chirping fills the air.
Farther down the hill the trees are bursting out with leaves, ready to slurp up the sun. The circle of life.
Pain has been the issue of the week. Adjustments to the pain pump, three in all, have greatly increased comfort and left her more energy for visiting. Sarah Lin cuddled at her lap just now and left. Lin’s prediction to her namesake–“You will learn lots of words and drive your mother crazy”. Now slumber. Circle of life.
This week a drama at the window–a sharp-shinned hawk swooping at the birds on the feeder, missing, then tucked quietly into the tree a few yards west of the site, leaving in a surge of power when I stepped out onto the deck. I like hawks. And songbirds. Circle of life.
Now there are 8 people living in our little stone house, as my daughter and her girls have moved in with us. Not a square inch of floor space, top to bottom, left fallow. “Bodies strewn from Hell to Breakfast”, as my father would say. Circle of life.
She (Lin) is much, much more at peace the last few days. Courtesy, I think, of those who love her, seen and close, unseen and distant, and unseen and close. Thank you. Circle of Life.
Lin continues to weaken. I can think of no way to sugar coat the message.
She retains her sense of humor, which I am beginning to think is part of the essence of who we are. She continues her concern for other people, above herself. She continues her desire to spend time with all of her “babies”.
She laughs at the antics of the apparently starving yet fat raccoon that raids our bird feeder now each night. She continues to keep a vigil of exactitude over the care we give her. She enjoys Sarah Lin, she of the three chins (very healthy grand daughter).
My sister Charlotte, who loves Lin dearly, and vice versa, has come from Boise to live with us for as long as needed. This has been a huge comfort. And she can cook!
Blog posts are continuing to spring up re: Lin. Here are a couple of recent posts, one from my brother, one from me:
Thank you all for your faith and prayers.
Some fun things happening.
Silverado, episodes from the Firefly TV SciFi series, the cooking channel have been Lin’s flicks of choice on the biggish screen in our living room. We are having fun watching them with her. And I occasionally watch March Madness, tho it has turned into March Sadness with my two teams being bounced out.
Oh, and a new grand-daughter. A BIG new grand-daughter—almost 10 pounds. That’s about 50% of Kadra’s body weight. A bit of a hard birth, but well done. Kadra looks radiant, the baby is, well… BEAUTIFUL. She was named Sarah Lin Pixton, so Lin is her namesake. And Sarah is a name I have always loved, and would have named a daughter, if things had happened that way. This too has been a lot of fun.
And some not so fun things. For Lin’s part, she wishes to report that a slow but steady decline continues. Not unexpected, but not welcome. Our angels continue to visit us. We continue to manage.
Lin’s most recent request? For thank you cards. You know her. Securing them now.
We thank all for your thoughts, prayers, and………food.
As I write this, we are all–4 males, one feline and three human males, and one human female, sitting in the knotty-pine-walled living room of our stone castle on the hill with natural light streaming in–two of us on computers, one of us on a kindle, and the female gazing at old technology (hardbound book), and the feline in recline, on the floor at our feet–quite the family vignette, and so, so familiar and comforting
, something that a Dutch Master would ache to paint, but I captured it instead on a Canon 7D–oops, the female just grabbed her walker and made a run for the bedroom–“time to get hooked in again”–one male left with her, and the other is assisting, the cat jumped onto the coffee table and is drinking water from a human glass and I had to remind him that he has his own water dish…oh, well, it was nice while it lasted…
Lin continues to be weaker this week. Decided against chemo as the cancer markers were up and the liver numbers were way up and Lin is so weak and the chemo, though we think it has helped us make it through these 7 months and counting, always knocks her for a temporary loop, especially as regards nausea and red blood cell count…still an option and we will re-discuss on Friday.
Oh, and Kadra just went into labor. Finally. I tease that her belly is so big now that her body is in 2 time zones. She carries them high and long. We are excited, to say the very least.
The Circle of Life. Again.
We appreciate the many good people who are connected in love and unity of purpose through this Blog and in other ways. We appreciate the angels who come to our mostly male abode each Monday and clean the spatters off the walls, etc. We appreciate the lone angel and her assistant who bring us flowers and chocolate chip cookies each Sunday. We appreciate the culinary artists who bring food each Monday and Thursday. We appreciate whoever planted the dense patches of daffodils that are once again taking over the property–something I look forward to each Spring with great anticipation. We appreciate whoever created all this beauty around us. All in all, a good day and a good season.
One at a time…as so many things are in the Circle.
Lin is looking better after her blood transfusion last Thursday. She’s got her color back. Makes me appreciate the gift of blood.
Feeling pretty weak at the moment; we are hoping for a resurgence. She wants to express appreciation for everyone’s prayers and support.
Lots happening in the family right now. On Saturday a double birthday for Lucas and Austin. Thursday Becky, Austin’s wife, driving in from Texas. The Texas grandkids have been here for a week. Kadra is starting to experience rhythmic pains and starting to dilate.
I thought I would share a few quotes that I have heard Lin say over the years.
“Life is too short to hang on to makeup that doesn’t really match your skin, to wear shoes that hurt and to eat fish if you really don’t like fish.
Always choose the child.
Put down your chisel!
Someone has to be the adult in this situation.
There is no such thing as an uncreative person.”
As well as some Blog posts that I have written quoting her:
Blue skies ahead.
Hi everyone this is Lin. Micah is typing this out for me.
I had my third chemo and first blood transfusion this week. I am feeling well but very tired. The doctor is pleased with my progress. My cancer markers are still down so that’s good. Next chemo is a week from Monday. The transfusion was a one-time deal due to the fact that my A cells were so low. It takes a little while for the effects of a transfusion to be felt so hopefully my numbers will be up and I will be getting a little more energy here. Thanks for your thoughts and love. I’ll talk to everyone next week. Take care,
Karen (our wonderful main hospice nurse) stopped by with some great news. Mom had blood draws done yesterday and told us that the CA 19-9 the pancreatic cancer marker) levels are down. It appears that this last round of chemo is helping. We will know more on Monday when we make the bi-weekly trip to Dr. Singh and discuss the next round. Mom is feeling a little weak and tired which appears to be a side affect of the combination of meds she is using to head of the round of crud that is picking up the rest of us field mice and bonking us on the head.